Sleeping is for Quitters

I am financially destitute. If I came across just a single penny lying on the ground, I would stop at nothing to have it. Women in labor, bullets whistling overhead, indeed, even the desperate calls of a bunny rabbit clenched in the jaws of a steel trap - all would be callously ignored in the name of weathering this financial famine. Yeah, that's not true. But I do have a box, and I have been whiling away the long unemployed hours by mounting daily safaris through my house and especially other people's houses for spare change to fill it with. I clip coupons, I sit through crappy matinee movies so I can sneak into the movie I actually want to see for a few bucks less, and each day brings a new ploy to trick my parents into filling up my gas tanks - no easy task. It's like a chess game where I closely control the level of gas in each car, and eventually checkmate them into driving the car that has only enough gas to reach the gas station. And all the while, the puppets are unaware of their strings MWAHHHHHHHHAHAHA

I finished Harry Potter, and I am hopelessly sad. The books have been a safe, and goddamned amazing haven to escape to, better than the best movie or video game. I don't like admitting this to myself, but for most of my life and still now, I have loved books mainly because when I really get into one, I don't have to live my own life. To me, it feels like the worst kind of cop out - trying to escape from your own life. Self exoneration - not from guilt, but from your decisions, and who you are as a person.

shower now, more later